I am not exactly sure why, but I feel compelled to explain to all of you first of all that I do not make a habit of reading articles from sources such as Redbook.com. I was looking for some stock prices on Yahoo! and while I was there I came across a site called Shine (www.shine.yahoo.com). It is a site that is designed to give lifestyle advice and provide resources specifically for women. There are two reasons I was interested in it. First was because we own a website called www.nevadamama.com which is a recource for moms and families and I thought that maybe there would be some good info we could share with our visitors. The second reason, and frankly the most compelling reason is I am always interested in trying to get a little more insight into the female mind. I figure my wife is a woman, my daughter (despite any attempts to stop her) will someday be a woman, I work with lots of women, and I find that sometimes these articles give me a slight advantage. (although if you ask any of the women I have referenced, they will all disagree that I have learned anything!)
Regardless of the attempt I know that any man reading this still thinks I have crossed a man-line in admitting that I have ever even considered looking at a woman's magazine for anything other than the pictures. However, understanding that most of you that are reading this are women, I should get something for trying to understand you... right?
Anyway, sometimes there are artiles that profess to represent the man's point of view. I like to read these to see if they are true. Most of the time they are dead on and most of those articles are written by female authors that clearly understand men. There was an article called Don't -Tell-the-Wife Secrets All Men Keep. ( http://www.redbookmag.com/love/men-secrets-ll ) This one was written by a man who clearly doesn't understand women. I can't say that I agree with most of the article but there was one part that was really funny to me. Secret #8 We don't really understand what you are talking about. The article plays men out to be completely incapable of comprehending our wives emotions and engaging in a serious conversation.
"You know how, during the day, you sometimes think about certain deep, complex "issues" in your relationship? Then when you get home, you want to "discuss" these issues? And during these "discussions," your man sits there nodding and saying things like "Sure, I understand," "That makes perfect sense" and "I'll do better next time"?
Well, we don't understand. It doesn't make any sense to us at all. And although we'd like to do better next time, we could only do so if, in fact, we had an idea of what you're talking about.
We do care. Just be aware that the part of our brain that processes this stuff is where we store sports trivia."
While we are not completely incapable, I'll admit that it can sometimes be difficult to keep track of where a conversation is going, even for me, especially if it is one of those emotionally charged relationship topics. They can jump all over the place and be somewhat confusing for us. So help us out, if you want us to do something, tell us exactly what it is and why. If you leave it to us to figure out, we'll almost always mess it up. I believe that some men use that stereotype to their favor. The way these guys see it, if you already think that they are an idiot that doesn't really understand what your trying to share with them, then maybe you'll skip them altogether and go talk to one of your equally frustrated girlfriends and leave them blissfully ignorant watching the game. I can't say that contributes to long term relationship success but then most of us can't think much further than the next time-out.
We don't always "get it" we are simple creatures, we love you and feel extremely lucky and blessed to have you in our lives. We are surprised everyday at the fact that you actually decide to spend your life with us. I look in the mirror everyday and can't figure out what keeps my wife coming home every night! (Must be those cure kids!) But we're glad you do, otherwise we'd starve...
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